Sunday, April 13, 2008

Standard Issue

Soldiers inevitably fall into 2 types.

The first arms him or herself with everything the quartermaster issues and trusts in army's procurement system to have chosen correctly for their survival and comfort.

The 2nd stands by the code that "standard issue is never enough" and is willing to spend above and beyond reasonable lengths to obtain only the best equipment for themselves.

In my time in the army I confess to spending most of my time as the latter variety, being known for my custom light saber-esk torch and love of exotic steel (ala obsidian blade from earlier posts)


But this story isn't about me.

Lieutenant Lane was a career soldier when I met her.

By lack of choice or ambition she had signed her contract to the "men in green" at an age when others would have been cramming for university exams.

By every count she was a better soldier than I was, running further (I could run faster though :P ), shooting better (Hey Laney, i hit 44 out of 50, what did you get? I didn't miss a shot?... Oh, thats great.) and jumping out of planes for the sheer fun of it.

And so it with great joy when I won our bet for a meal on who would have a faster obstacle course time (I beat her time on the Standard Obstacle Course by 10 seconds)that I rubbed it in her face by requesting a nice seafood restaurant dinner. It was not a cheap meal.

Days later I walked into her office to borrow a compass.

Hey Laney, can I borrow your compass? I think I buried mine in the last exercise.

Sure its in my webbing pockets, get it yourself

And as I rummaged through the webbing (the utility belt typed thing that soldiers keep stuff in) pockets for the compass, I suddenly noticed.

Hey Laney, This isn't standard issue is it?

Nope, I got it custom made, kevlar weave in the belt and the back holds a couple of ceremic plates strong enough to stop a bullet from 100m

Sweet lord this thing weighs a ton! Do you always run the obstacle course in this thing?

Of course I do, its the only webbing I own now

So I guess I owe you dinner now?

Nope, I want a torch like yours

But you already have a surefire torch, why would you want another one?

Just to be able to say that yours isn't a one off anymore?

You're a mean winner you know.

No, you're just a girly man who can't run faster than a girl.

I think she uses that torch for night reading...

~~~

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I imagine Lara Croft.