My mates

its been 10 years since high school's end

14 since we started back at old MHS.

It was a simpler life then,

and everyday we'd get on the 7.18 Glen Waverley.

Over the years that train ride's been filled with card games of all sorts, (big 2 anyone?) and various heated debates.

So here now I give you my friends simply known affectionately as The Guys. (Kev Toh not present in pic)

Everything's the same, but different

I've used this term before, but never for something happy.

It was used when I returned to my hometown after my army days, when I felt left behind by life's continual march.

But today, today I get to use it on something great.

Today is when the unknowing and wittingly grown inches into tomorrow,

today, is when everything stays the same, but yet everything is different.





Hurrah!

Spread the joy and smile dammit

Its Christmas!

And I've had a chances to catch up with loads of my friends.

The writing bug has flared a few times this season but I think I'll let it slide.

I'm just glad to be home.

A few short notes:

+ Little one, thank you for keeping me in touch with the real world.

+ K, thanks for being around, its all still fun.

+ Marsman, take care bro, ride safe and hunt well.

+ DeFrance, I don't know why the rest don't see this, but ur're a cold, unfriendly know it all. I'd snap that silly grin off your face, but i've never seen you smile.

+ New career paths? Maybe I should consider it.

Good bye My Friend

As the car pulls into the driveway it is casually mentioned.

"Oh by the way, we put Benji up for adoption, he passed the test and has gone to live with some nice people now."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, we didn't want to worry you whilst you were settling down into the new job and city... With everyone out of the house now its hard to keep both dogs."

"I'm not happy about this"

"He wasn't your dog, it wasn't your decision to make"

No dammit but he was my friend.

He was my constant for the last 11 years.

He was the symbol of happiness in my darkness.

He was home to me in the jungle.

He was the silent companion that understood all.

He was... thats just it, he was...

Good bye my smelly friend.

There are so many things to be sorry about, and so many things to thank you for.

I hope there is a farm. I hope that you are happy.

Goodbye.

Home sweet home

This time tomorrow I'll be home.

I can't wait...

The recent days have faded to mundane and even the occasional sloshes of grog have not been great at luring out the writer in me.

Perhaps after this Christmas recharge.

New life!

I got home from work late today and looked in the bird cage to find...







An egg!

thats right!

Looks like John and Jane have certainly been busy!

The Calvary Musters

50 cc scooters are pretty much the smallest things that can be road registered.

Underpowered and generally seen as road menaces that are dangerously slow, the only things that cop more flak on the roads are people on push bikes.

(that's a whole different can of worms there. The short version, you want to use the roads that cars use? Pay road tax / rego on that there push bike and we'll talk...)

So what happens when an army of bikes is gathered for a good cause?

Its like something out of a fantasy novel.

Where (in David Eddings stories anyway) the good guys, facing a terrible foe with an endless army, will put aside their differences for the common good.

~~~

I had seen armies muster before, a full gun battalion, a brigade of armor, even seen part of a division level infantry moblisation. But nothing like this.

thousands of them, in a multitude of shapes, sizes and colors, gathered in orderly disorder.

The Chrome covered Harley Davidsons, gleaming like knights. The grizzled dirt bikes, looking like ranger scouts. And the sports bikes with their flared fairings, reminding me of the fleet footed elves. And last but not least, scooters, fitting the description of a hobbit to a tee, small and harmless looking.

Far far ahead, a flag is raised. Then the wave begins to spread down the massive column as engines fired up and octane fills the air.

The ride of the Valkyries had began.

~~~

The crowds gathered on the footpaths in droves, cheering the column on as it passed.

Pillion riders flung sweet treats for the children in the crowd, and hands were stuck out to give high fives to the riders.

I had pulled over to make a quick call (sister flying off to NY see?) and gotten back into the ride when I realized that the column had been broken by a passing train.

The head of the pack was far down the road whilst everyone behind me was behind the train tracks.

I rev the engine and pulled into the middle of the empty lanes.

The crowd realizes that the road isn't empty anymore and see the lone scooter buzzing up the street.

A man spots the flapping santa's hat on the helmet and starts to cheer.

Suddenly they're all cheering, I stick my hand out and high five them as I pass.

Boy that felt great.

~~~


We had hit the highway portion of the ride and the column had well and truly broken up into a large string of individual riders.

then in the distance, I spot a growing bottle neck.

As I pass it I can make out the wreckage of the grey sports bike being slowly wenched onto a truck, it looks very broken... and I can't see any sign of the rider.

Nods of respect and sympathy by all before they all rev past.

I do hope the rider is ok

*its for the kids.*

Epic!

I've had an epic adventure today.

Every year at this time, motorcycle riders gather together and raise money for the needy children of Adelaide.

Strapping an optic fiber santa's hat (Ho ho ho!) on my helmet and a red santa's sack full of toys on the scooter, I joined up for the action, and boy was it fun!

A few other bits of writing spilling out from this adventure that will probably give better imagery, so here we go...

The tongue has the power of life and death

I don't understand why I give you so much power over me.

Why am I always the bad guy?

Why aren't I ever good enough?

And why can't you let me be?

It takes two hands to clap.

Friendships are such a hard thing to maintain aren't they?

Especially with your borders spread so thin on so many fronts.

I'm not sure I can relate.

I've never had the kind of full schedule that you seem to have.

No, friendships certainly don't come cheap

Its Friday...

From an inkling that i was given~

And the darkness turned to the other darkness:" Run, something holy this way comes..."


~~~~~

It's Friday. Jesus is arrested in the garden where He was praying. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. The disciples are hiding and Peter's denying that he knows the Lord. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. Jesus is standing before the high priest of Israel, silent as a lamb before the slaughter. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. Jesus is beaten, mocked, and spit upon. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. Those Roman soldiers are flogging our Lord with a leather scourge that has bits of bones and glass and metal, tearing at his flesh. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. The Son of man stands firm as they press the crown of thorns down into his brow. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. See Him walking to Calvary, the blood dripping from His body. See the cross crashing down on His back as He stumbles beneath the load. It's Friday; but Sunday's a coming.

It's Friday. See those Roman soldiers driving the nails into the feet and hands of my Lord. Hear my Jesus cry, "Father, forgive them." It's Friday; but Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, bloody and dying. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. The sky grows dark, the earth begins to tremble, and He who knew no sin became sin for us. Holy God who will not abide with sin pours out His wrath on that perfect sacrificial lamb who cries out, "My God, My God. Why hast thou forsaken me?" What a horrible cry. But Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. And at the moment of Jesus' death, the veil of the Temple that separates sinful man from Holy God was torn from the top to the bottom because Sunday's coming.

It's Friday. Jesus is hanging on the cross, heaven is weeping and hell is partying. But that's because it's Friday, and they don't know it, but Sunday's a coming.

And on that horrible day 2000 years ago, Jesus the Christ, the Lord of glory, the only begotten Son of God, the only perfect man died on the cross of Calvary. Satan thought that he had won the victory. Surely he had destroyed the Son of God. Finally he had disproved the prophecy God had uttered in the Garden and the one who was to crush his head had been destroyed. But that was Friday.

Now it's Sunday. And just about dawn on that first day of the week, there was a great earthquake. But that wasn't the only thing that was shaking because now it's Sunday. And the angel of the Lord is coming down out of heaven and rolling the stone away from the door of the tomb. Yes, it's Sunday, and the angel of the Lord is sitting on that stone and the guards posted at the tomb to keep the body from disappearing were shaking in their boots because it's Sunday, and the lamb that was silent before the slaughter is now the resurrected lion from the tribe of Judah, for He is not here, the angel says. He is risen indeed.

It's Sunday, and the crucified/resurrected Christ has defeated death, hell, sin and the grave. It's Sunday. And now everything has changed. It's the age of grace, God's grace poured out on all who would look to that crucified lamb of Calvary. Grace freely given to all who would believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross of Calvary was buried and rose again. All because it's Sunday.

It's Friday! But Sunday's a Coming!

A band of brothers

I've bitten the bullet,

after all these years. (has it been years? ... yes it has)

I've gotten my hands on Band of Brothers again, and I'll watch it in its entirety again.

I remember when it came on TV, it was after I had made my decision to join, but before I had moved back to enlist.

I remember watching every week as the stories unfolded and melded.

a time later, a dark long time later.

I faced my men, men that I trained and trained with.

For the last weeks I had been taking them through the process that I too had gone through.

Forging weapons by first breaking their spirits.

I remember dishing them punishment, sudden and harsh, because I noticed a certain amount of slackness and incompetence with their machine guns.

I made them learn, I burned it into them, like it was branded into me.

But i digress,

It was long week, mixed with lectures and field training, they were tired, and so was I.

Friday afternoon, the schedule said Artillery Doctrine lecture.

They filed in, they sat, ready to pass the time, minds supersaturated.

To their surprise I flicked the lights and started the DVD - episode 2 Day of Days, featuring the Brécourt Manor Assault, a text book example of the assault on a fixed position.

We watched, then I taught. At question time, they surprised me, they gave me alternative strategies and scenarios. Absorption, analysis, improvisation to modern weaponry.

They all got to go home early that Friday night.

No one thought to question why a bunch of artillery men needed to learn about infantry maneuvers. It didn't matter, we all enjoyed ourselves, and we all learnt.

A night under the stars with Elton John

After sitting for hours in the blazing heat, a black chopper emerges over the horizon.

"look! He's waving at us!" shouts an excited female fan. The crowd waves at the chopper as it settles down.

The bitch himself struts on stage, resplendent in a black velvet coat embroided with multihued flowers (ooo so pretty) to begin the concert, but not before having a (right royal?) whinge about this is the earliest he's ever started a concert.

Then he sits at the yamaha concert grand and weaves his magic.

2.5 hrs non stop, one man, one piano and nothing else but the weave of a master story teller and the musical genius that is Elton John.

Sure he may be an old, man loving he bitch, but boy can he sing and play that piano.

Wish you were there with me.

Electricity - Billy Elliot the Musical

I can't really explain it,
I haven't got the words
It's a feeling that you can't control
I suppose it's like forgetting, losing who you are
And at the same time something makes you whole
It's like that there's a music playing in your ear
And I'm listening, and I'm listening and then I disappear

And then I feel a change
Like a fire deep inside
Something bursting me wide open impossible to hide
And suddenly I'm flying, flying like a bird
Like electricity, electricity
Sparks inside of me
And I'm free I'm free

It's a bit like being angry,
it's a bit like being scared
Confused and all mixed up and mad as hell
It's like when you've been crying
And you're empty and you're full
I don't know what it is, it's hard to tell
It's like that there's a music playing in your ear
But the music is impossible, impossible to hear
But then I feel it move me
Like a burning deep inside
Something bursting me wide open impossible to hide
And suddenly I'm flying, flying like a bird
Like electricity, electricity
Sparks inside of me
And I'm free I'm free
Electricity, sparks inside of me
And I'm free, I'm free
I'm free. Free I'm free

The secret life of cream

As I write this,

one of the most health conscious people I know, shovels gobs of cream and jelly into her mouth.

It is midnight, I am aghast.

It is like watching Linford Christie sculling pints next to me at the local.

Oh how the mighty have fallen.

I am reminded of the farside, comic, where mary shuts the blinds, locks the door and has a little lamb.

There is much laughter in the house.

I'm going to miss this.

even the yelling and the guilt.

Now excuse me, there's a trifle dish waiting for me.

Earthsea

Its been an enjoyable few days.

The joys of entertaining, cooking for an audience, being able to utter anything but table for one.

All pales in comparison to remembering what the light is.

Light is, when you push back the darkness, and know that even if you can't see them, an army pushes with you.

Friends, don't let me forget this.

Another few snippets floating in my mind:

1) Across the universe - This movie totally rocks, I cannot even begin to talk about how taken I was with this film. If you love the music of the Beatles or musicals or loves stories or just a good movie, just go and buy a ticket now.

2) 6 years... its a long time kiddo, The stories I could tell... 2001, what a year it was, a degree, new love, new adventures. The world can change in the blink of an eye, let alone 6 years. Hope that we're even better friends then.

3) Earthsea, names and the power of existence.

Cooking up a storm

Its hot out side,

Its going to be a sleepless night i guess.

I'll expand more on these another time:

1) 5 hrs in the kitchen, wow a new record.

2) I was so tired, drunk and buggered I missed garbage day? Wow

3) My first visitor! Excitement.

4) A gunners conversation

5) days of baited breath, "are you safe?

I'm Hammered!

Plastered, smashed, inebriated, off my face, at the board ... call it whatever you want.

I've been drunk since 2.30 this afternoon and I don't give a damn! Whooo!

Here's the secret folks,

I'm a talky drunk.

Every damned poet needs an audience,

and mines just running off for the sunset.

A fire without fuel dies.

where were you when I needed you?

Would you rather read my words then hear my voice?

Damn you all and your indifference.

Meet the finches

So i've finally caved in and accepted house mates in Casa de Caravaggio, more for the company then the financial reason you see.

So now I share the house with a nice little couple, John and Jane Finch.

So far its been relatively peaceful, the two of them sit in the corner of the room quietly discussing whatever little couples talk about.

I had a brief conversation with them but they seemed to be really stressed out with the move (must be newly married methinks) so I think I'll leave them to settle in before I start chilling out with them.

Oooo, I think I hear the first signs of an argument, entertainment has begun!

Yes I am... Dammit

Amidst a conversation,

A parry swung towards my head.

"And so all the others are just plain and normal (or to that effect)?"

And in a sweet poison in the tone, "what did you mean when you said that you're better than..."

I knew those tones and I was simply too tired, so I answered safely and in some if not most parts truthfully.

Uniqueness and all that.

I think that some are more unique then others. I think there's certain beauty in us all.
I think that if men so wish, they will live and die for vanilla and call it gold.
I know that if women so wish, all flaws disappear into potential and beggars turn into princes.

As for me?

I think most of all of you should know: (well, those that get to see at least more than 1 facet of me anyway)

That my ego dictates to me that I am better then most

That I am aloof sometimes and in my own way rightfully so.

That I do on occasion use my name, voice and mannerisms as weapons

That I know that when you like me you call this confidence and when you don't you call it arrogance.


"Englishman In New York"

I don't drink coffee I take tea my dear
I like my toast done on one side
And you can hear it in my accent when I talk
I'm an Englishman in New York

See me walking down Fifth Avenue
A walking cane here at my side
I take it everywhere I walk
I'm an Englishman in New York

I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York

If, "Manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the day
It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
Be yourself no matter what they say

I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York

Modesty, propriety can lead to notoriety
You could end up as the only one
Gentleness, sobriety are rare in this society
At night a candle's brighter than the sun

Takes more than combat gear to make a man
Takes more than a license for a gun
Confront your enemies, avoid them when you can
A gentleman will walk but never run

If, "Manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the day
It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
Be yourself no matter what they say

I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York

Scoot!

It was a lazy sunny holiday,

A treat for myself in the final days of my army contract.

I could have gone anywhere I wanted, all I had to do was ask and they would send me, they owed me so.

Instead I fell off the radar and limped around asia with my backpack and a wad of greenbacks.

It was the days of the Tsunami aftermath, I figured I would see how some parts were recovering.

It was surprising how fast the locals had recovered, the roads were all cleared, the shops rebuilt and the bars re liquored.

The only testament of the killer waves' passing was the ruined carcass of a once beach from McDonalds fenced off from the rest of the beach. It seemed that it was a management decision not to rebuild until they were completely certain the Tsunami was an "Act of God".

I remember standing in front of the shop trying to chose between the racing bike and the black scooter, and going for the "safer" option in my head. "Men that limp should not ride bikes that can go 200 km/h" i remember telling myself.

So I puttered around that place in a shiny black honda scooter, puttered being a relative statement of course.

Much later when I returned to civilization, Bo Grosso and I concurred that going at 60 on a scooter, feels like doing 100 in a car.

My little black scooter used to hit 80km/h, Ahh those were the days.

I relived them as I stood in front of yet another shop, and I pointed at a little red scooter this time.

That one I said, the little red honda.

"You know, we've got dirt bikes and vespas too" started the
sales man.

Yes I knew, but seeing that lil red toy, just made me smile... and as I ran my hands over the frame, with all its rusty bits and faded paint, I could see it restored to its former glory.

"1985 huh?" I said as I prepared to get the price I had in my head, "looks like it needs a lot of work..."


Late that night, when I was sure no one would be around, I took a ride on a little red scooter, a 1985 honda nifty fifty.

No helmet, just like back then. tiny engine, just like back then. Roar of the wind & smiling like a baby bird that just found its wings again, just like back then.


________

Epilogue

A few days later I was back at the shop handing the keys back the salesman.

"Not safe enough" I told him, it simply can't keep up with traffic.

Truth is, I knew that when I bought it. I had intended to fix up that little motor to be as powerful as the one from the black scooter, but somewhere during that late night ride, I jsut realized... I can't be bothered anymore.

So there I was, handing the keys back.

Its time for something new,
I'll know it when I see it.

At last... a post!

Its been a lonely time out here.

Thank the Lord he saw fit to send me up to Sydney for a long weekend to spend time with Bo Grosso, to whom I am grateful for much hospitality and friendship.

Once again since my last post, there have been many a flare up of things I could have written about.

Fortunately for all involved, I do recognize that my writing side is also my melodramatic and meloncolic so I will not fully indulge it.

Flashes of thoughts gone past lately:

1) Holy Shit is that how much I've spent?

2) Damned Fobs with their names from the big book of asian names.

3) Riding a scooter at 45 km/h, wayyy scarier then driving at 240 km/h

4) Almost a month here, no new friends yet, can I only properly relate to asians?

5) Be proud of your name dammit. It is a weapon, a charm, it is strength.

6) So strange to hear the words of war, coming from the innocent (or at least perceived so)

7) No one rode for the cup, as predicted, yet... I'm still disappointed.

Enough snippets.

Shall we begin?

The net goes up in the south

That's right my avid readers and dear friends.

The net's finally connect at my South Australian abode and with it the chance to post once more.

There was a small slew of stories and verse that built up in these days as I set up shop and home here but I think I will leave those for another time.

It was 4 days here before I spied a glimpse of the moon,

a tired Cheshire Cat bearly peeking through the darkness, the wisps of clouds clinging to it like swamp vines.

I felt both revived and drained, I can't tell which won that night.

But enough melancholy.

I have settled down well, my initial hesitation about my new house have disappeared on initial inspection of the insides and moving in.

At least the insides are nice, I jokingly told a friend that it resembles an ikea show room.

So strange a knight in his Ikea Palace.

You call me sir and rightly so...

to whom would i ever speak those words to now?

Anyhow, more updates.

My new office is huge, we have 3 cruise missiles, 2 torpedoes and 2 surface to air missiles on display at all times.

I walk into work every day feeling like Maxwell Smart as I go through the 4 sets of security doors and the guards (can you hear the theme going?).

I freak out slightly most times as the sequential locks have a fixed delay and they have to seal each chamber before the next opens.

More in the next episode...

I feel like i should write

Just to let you all know I'm still alive.

yes I am.

Caravaggio lands!

Dear all,

Much as I dislike posts that simply inform people about how the day went (I woke up , I had OJ and eggs for breakfast, I went to work etc etc... )

I feel that my usual prose would not do at this time.

So was my first night in Adelaide.


---
I arrived in Adelaide after a 2 hr delay sitting on the tarmac.

During my wait the business man I sat next to and I played a little game of who had the better toys.

I pulled out my ipod to get music, he pulls out his.
I pull out my B&O earphones, he pulls out his bose ones.
I get my pda out to check my notes, he pulls his out to tap on randomly.
I got sick of the game and pulled out my laptop to watch movies instead.
He looked across from his seat to enjoy the latest episode of Gandam Wing with me.

When i did arrive and Adelaide and made it to my temporary place of residence (The Adelaide Regent, Grand Apts! Well, they were a little bit grand at least)

I simply plonked myself on the sofa and chilled out watching Heroes (whoo!)

After which I went for a short walk, hoping to catch a glimmer of moon light.

I found none.

The bed was comfortable and I was exhausted, but I could not sleep till 4am (Actually I don't remember falling asleep, I just remember being constantly awake)

At least the car's arrived today.

I've found the local library (Thank the lord for those!) with 1 hr a day internet.

Whoo hoo!

But I don't anticipate being able get online again anytime soon.

Its time

erg... I have a headache and a strange crick in my neck.

I'm tired and feel really worn out. It must be a cold creeping on...

I fly tomorrow, i'm packed, i'm trying to get psyched up.

I REALLY don't need to fall sick right now.

Hope Reigns

Words that fly in the mindscape right now:

Darkness fears not those who cower.

A memory of my own words from my own lecture

Steps on how to take the hill:

1) Call for neutralization and pound them to the ground.
2) Establish a firebase and pound them with the MGs to keep them surpressed
3) Bayonets on and take that ground.

Lord help me, I'm sick of this purgatory,
I'm going to take that promised land.


I will get there - Boyz II Men

Ohohah
Hey
Yeah
I've been wanderin' 'round in the dark
Been lost somewhere where no light could shine on my heart
I have known a pain so deep
But I know my faith will free me
[Get there] And I'll get through this
[Get there] I'll find my way again
So don't tell me that it's over
'Cause each step just gets me closer
(I will get there) I will get there
(I will get there) I will get there somehow
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night (Oh, yes, I will)
And make it through to the other side
(Get there) Get there
(Get there) Get there
I've been in these chains for so long
I'll break free and I'll be there where I belong
Hold my head up high, I'll stand tall
And I swear this time I won't fall
[Get there] I will do this
[Get there] No matter what it takes
'Cause I know no limitations
And I'll reach my destination, I will get there
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there (Ooh) somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night
And make it through to the other side
(Ooh, get there) Get there
(Get there) Get there
Well, the night is cold and dark
But somewhere the sun is shining
And I'll feel it shine on me
I'll keep on tryin', I'll keep on tryin'
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night
And make it through to the other side
Get there, get there
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (I'll cross that river for you)
Nothing's stoppin' me now (OhwhoaI)
I will get through (Through) the night
And make it through to the other side (Ohhoohho)
(Get there) Get there
(Ooh, get there) Get there (Whoaoh)
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (I'll cross it for your love)
Nothing's stoppin' me now (No matter what)
I will get through the night (I will get through the night)
And make it through to the other side
(Get there) Get there
(Ooh, get there) Get there
Get there
Ohhooh
I'll get there

So beautiful, I almost want to cry... Dammit

I attended a wedding this weekend, there seemed to be a few of them this weekend, having heard of at least 3 others going on.

This however, is about the beautiful union between Coffeeman and Dr Gal.

I could go on and describe the ceremony in detail, but I won't, or rather, can't.

Because all I can picture is the huge and awesome power of the single colour that nearly overwhelmed me in that church.

A creamish blast of radiance, that carried with it every warm thing that could be imagined.

And even as the colour faded, confining itself to a simple glow about the happy couple.

In that moment, I believed again,

Amor Vincit Omnia.

Congrats Coffeeman and Dr Gal. May you have every blessing possible, and may we all who still seek, one day find that peace that you now possess.

With a Twist.

Dancing, with no actual dancing.

And a concert...with no music... well maybe except the Dixie Chicks (So not well recorded...)

pizza that turns into mussels and parma.

insults both given and taken (Just like two big old rusty battleships blasting away at each other)

Words with feints, parrys and wounds.

Ice cream with pouts

and songs that finally manage to hammer out of my mind.

Just remember.

If you look really closely,

you'll all see 2 Rs.


Wandering the King's Highway - L. Coward

(this is such an ancient song that even google can't help me find proper lyrics for it. if you do know where i can find the lyrics please help!)

I've always been a wanderer,
summer and winter too.
Traveling the whole world over,
tramping my whole life through.

But when I start my journey,
at the dawn of another day.

I give a health to comrades.
Friends of the great highway.

Chorus:

So, so long to you!
got to be on the road again.

So long to you!
got to hitch up my load again.

Its been great to meet you here.
right good company and right good cheer.

So now then my lads,
would anyone like to come with me?
A wanderer's life is free.
As I go, rain or snow.
Wandering the King's highway.

Parting is filled with sorrow.
But as I roam this land.
I shall meet again tomorrow.
Friends who will clasp my hand.

And when i start my journey
at the dawn of a brand new day.
I and my friendly memories.
Will get up and on our way.

Chorus:


So, so long to you!
got to be on the road again.

So long to you!
got to hitch up my load again.

Its been great to meet you here.
right good company and right good cheer.

So now then my lads,
would anyone like to come with me?
A wanderer's life is free.
As I go, rain or snow.
Wandering the King's highway.

All packed!

Thats right folks.

All my stuff is right now sitting in boxes ready to take the train to Adelaide.

After packing till 4 in the morning and waking to THE BIGGEST headache i have ever had.

And waiting for 2 hours more than i should have

A cheerful man (Ex air force defense, i think he was an 84 mm gunner, a tough breed they are) from King and Wilson's removalists came and took all my stuff away.

Go West! my possessions seemed to sing as the truck drove away,

Go West indeed, I've always thought some of those objects were a little too cheerful for their own good...

(Go West) Sun in wintertime
(Go West) We will do just fine
(Go West) Where the skies are blue
(Go West) this is what we're gonna do

There where the air is free
We'll be (We'll be) what we want to be (Aah aah aah aah)
Now if we make a stand (Aah)
We'll find (We'll find) our promised land (Aah)

(I know that) There are many ways
(To live there) In the sun or shade
(Together) We will find a place
(To settle) Where there's so much space

(Without rush) And the pace back east
(The hustling) Rustling just to feed
(I know I'm) Ready to leave too
(So that's what) We are gonna do

(What we're gonna do is
Go West) Life is peaceful there
(Go West) There in the open air
(Go West) Where the skies are blue
(Go West) This is what we're gonna do

War wounds... a story part 1

Op 1: Sensors locked on... datastream stabilizing... telemetry looks good sir, we're getting good data.

Cmdr: Very good, take readings up to 20 clicks and send the data to the CP asap. Standard burst transmission, they're counting on us for this information.

Op 1: Will do sir, data looks good to 3 ks now and still coming in strong.

Cmdr: Op 2, prep a 2nd probe in case the telemetry fails, we can't afford any mistakes.

*picking up the radio handset*

Cmdr: [radio] Sarg 1, parameter update over

Sarg 1: [radio] Looks quiet out here boss, if I didn't know better I'd say we were out strolling with the girls by the beach again. over

Cmdr: [radio] Well, if we do this right we'll all be home soon, then you all can come over for dinner sometime, I've been hankering to make my seafood stew again. over

Sarg 2: [radio] *Groan* Sir, why can't you make that korean beef thing again? I really liked that one. over

Cmdr: *Long pause*[radio] Well i suppose I could give that dish a shot. over

Sarg 1: [radio] Dude, don't you remember? Sir doesn't make that dish... over

Sarg 2: [radio] Oh yeah...it was his... erm... sorry bout that sir. over

An operator runs into the command vehicle with a new report.


Cmdr: [radio] Guys, I just got an urgent report on the CP , looks like we have reports of enemy airbourne in our ops area, send out the prowlers. over

Sarg 1: [radio] Roger sir...

The conversation is interrupted as silver star blooms in the sky.

Sarg 2: [radio] Sir, trip wires gone off, whoever they are will be in firing range in 8 mikes, confirm clearance to engage? over

Cmdr: [radio]Sarg 2, Dig the boys in and confirm engage foxtrot, clear to break on engagement. over

*Turning to the 3 operators behind him*

Cmdr:

Ops 2, report back to the CP we have parameter breach and are operating trigger open and ask them to confirm friendlies in the area now.

Ops 3, comms for a UAV flyby, I believe that delta 9 is covering this ops area. Use this command freq 119.36 with this scramble *scribbles codes on a piece of paper*.

Ops 1 how much longer for that data?

Ops 1: at least 10 mikes sir.

the sharp snare of gun fire rips into the night, punctuated by the dull thud of a claymore being detonated.

The commander snatches up the radio whilst gesturing furiously at his men in the command vehicle to get their weapons.

Cmdr: [radio] Sitrep people, what the hell's going on?

The radio crackles to life bringing sounds of the battle into the command vehicle.

Sarg 2: [radio] Sir we got infantry contact on our front, looks to be at least a couple of sections strength. We've got them held for the moment but they'll be trying to flank right soon.

The commander looks at his watch, 3 mins before the telemetry would complete, the pulse transmission would take another 30 seconds on top of that... There wasn't going to be enough time... unless...

Cmdr: [radio] Sarg 1, pull back all heavy weapons to the east side of acorn hill, and bring suppressing fire bearing 299 mils. over

Sarg 2, I want you to hold until suppressing fire commences and pull back to the command vehicle. Over

Sarg 1 & 2: [Radio] Roger out sir.

The commander's plan was in action, sarg 1 would swing his troops around and trek to a higher point of elevation where they would cover the withdrawal of the other troops back to the command vehicle, the heavier weaponry in his group should hold the enemy back and the new front of attack would foil any attempts at a flanking maneuver, buying valuable time.

Cmdr: Ops 1, send the telemetry through once we have it and prep the convoy for departure, Sarg 2 will assume command when he gets back. Tell him to take route 32 back to CP lines, we should be safe there.

Ops 1: What about you sir?

Cmdr: Who do you think is going to cover Sarg 1 and his boys as they run back from their hill?

------

Tired...

Inspired by Godwin's message tonight at encounter.

Encounter... it was indeed, a call out from my Lord King to his wayward knight.

Return to the alter I will, for you Lord are my goal, my path, my strength.


Be with me lord as I walk this path.

give me strength lord, to fight the darkness both without and within.

Help me radiate from the inside out, your glory.

Let me always remember, that in all I do, I do for you, with you and by you.

Amen

Dining with Deek

An old place,

a portal if you will.

Through the doors and Paris awaits.

The ever changing board of promises.

A companion full of old and new surprises.

The food comes and goes and with it joy and excitement joins the party.

Stories are exchanged, queries answered, laughter with good food, now all that is needed is the Tuscan sun.

A toast then, to all things quirky. May they always fly free.

Songs that float in the air tonight.

You and me - life house

what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up
and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

all of the things that I want to say
just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping inwards
you got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

cause it's you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

there's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
everything she does is beautiful
everything she does is right

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to lose
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do
nothing to prove
and it's you and me and all of the people
and I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

what day is it
and in what month
this clock never seemed so alive

Old Dirt Hill - Dave Matthews Band

Can't catch me ride my bike down the old dirt hill,
First time without my training wheels.
First time I kissed you I lost my legs,
Bring that beat back to me again.
I hear scream and shout out loud of innocence
And days when all we did would never end.

Smoking under the railroad bridge
I used to ride my bike down that old dirt hill
The first time I kissed you I lost my legs
Bring that beat back to me again
I hear scream and shout out loud of innocence
Days when all we did would never end

Screaming down that old dirt hill

Bring that beat back to me again

She stole __
That's when the days I remember seem so far away

That's just a kid. That's what I miss. Just a kid.
That's what I miss.

Bring that beat back to me again [3x]
First time all with good, good friends.

(Can't catch me, can't catch me)
Bring that beat back to me again [4x]

An officer, a gentleman , a fraud

A man should know his place...

a man should know his betters...

a man should take responsibility for his words and actions...

a man should defend his lady's honor...

a man should not forget his debts...

a man should be slow to anger...

a man should conduct himself with honour and dignity...

A false knight... under all this shining armour.

As tainted as those he crusades against.

I am sorry i've failed you all ... especially you.

A flag is lowered.

Today was my last day at the Hive.

Such a simple simple statement. Such a profound milestone.

The end of an era... the beginning of an age...

I remember starting here 2 years ago, arriving 30 mins early and sitting in the car waiting.

The first office bbq, where my phone rang just as the big boss's speech ended.

This was / is the birthplace of suit, this is how Bob turned into German Bob and how I purchased my first property.

Thank you lord for my time in Hive and all those within.

From the bottom of my heart.

Thank you

The silence of erggg

Its late, I'm tired and about to conk off.

Something stirs inside and I'm hoping that writing about it will calm it.

But alas, even as these words flow, the stirring continues.

Waning silence has been met with the refuge of cold hard logic.

And as smaller but yet more important countdowns click to the beat of the impending drum,

a small but persistent voice asks who bloody cares?

As men fight for relevance and honor, and worlds shift on axis, my banner is lowered from my comfort zone.

Pats on the back and 3 cheers all around fill the growing void, for moments of a moment the colours return... and strangely too.

Heart red streaked and flashed with gray. Vege green with glimmers of gunmetal steel.

No poetry tonight... this is imagery overload... this is too much black beret... this is errrrrggggg

Jesus Walk...

Beautiful words from an Angry man.

J Ivy, these words rock.

We are all here for a reason on a particular path
You don't need a curriculum to know that you are part of the math
Cats think I'm delirious but I'm so damn serious
That's why I expose my soul to the globe,
the world I'm trynna make it better for these little boys and girls
I'm not just another individual

My spirit is a part of this, thats why I get spiritual
But I get my hymns from him
So it's not me, it's he thats lyrical

I'm not a miracle
I'm a heaven-sent instrument
My rythmatic regiment navigates melodic notes for your soul and your mental
Thats why I'm instrumental

Vibrations is what I'm into
Yeah I need my loot by rent day
But that ain't what gives me the heart of Kunte Kinte

I'm tryin to give us, us free like Cinque
I can't stop That's why I'm hot

Determination, dedication, motivation
I'm talking to you of my many inspirations
When I say I can't let you or self down
If I were on the highest cliff on the highest riff
And you slipped off the side and clenched on to your life in my grip
I would never, ever, let you down

And when these words are found
Let it be known that God's penmanship has been signed in the language called love

Thats why my breath is felt by the deaf
And why my words are heard and confined to the ears of the blind
I, too, dream in color, and in rhyme
So I guess I'm one of a kind in a full house
Cause whenever I open my heart, my soul, or my mouth
A touch of God rains out.

The audience of one

A friend asked me this morning why I shrouded my writings in crypitisms.

It makes it hard to understand! Complained the avid reader.

Another questioned the very core of Semper Fi based on the words of shadows.

Sometimes you don't need the story full. To know the endings, or the last notes of the song...

Perhaps one day soon, this surge of verse and lyrics will cease as it has once before.

And these halls will echo and reverberate no more.

And then I shall my audience bore,

of my lunches, dinners and idle chitchat.

Enjoy my vagueness whilst it lasts, as seasons ebb and flows erode.

songs may shift as seasons do. Like lunar tides over the waves.

So the short answer?

Yes I'm vague.

But I enjoy the melodrama.

And sometimes at least so do you all.

Ritz...

Ever wake up one morning and realize that you been surviving on Ritz?

I believe Eddie Murphy said it best

If you're starving and somebody
throw you a cracker,
               
you gonna be like this:
             
"Goddamn, that's the best cracker
I ever ate in my life!
                 
"That ain't no regular cracker, was it?
What was that, a Saltine?
              
"Goddamn, that was delicious.
              
"That wasn't no Saltine. That was...
That was a Ritz. That wasn't a Ritz?
              
"God, that was the best cracker
I ever ate in my life.
              
"Can I have another one, please?
Please, one more."

I need steak...

Not just any steak mind you. It has to be the right cut, with the right grain & marbling done just tha perfect medium rare. And don't even get me started on the perfect sauce for it.

Just get started on the steak, we'll worry about the sauce later.

*Goes off to the kitchen to hunt for a steak*

The market by the wall

Morning drifts into my dream, and like a flower blooming expands my mind into consciousness.

Eyes open and gaze on the clock and ... Oh nooooo!!!!

I've overslept!

Today was market day, it was suppose to my last for a while.

Hastily rushing out of the door, I made my way there (without speeding of course).

There was still time no? Time to catch the magic?

As I pulled into the side lane, I spied the colored signs, yellow and blue announcing the festivities.

A sigh of relief, the sun was shining yet the air was cool, a perfect day for the market.

This is one of the rare gateways where the wall of reality and memories thin for me. And I try not to visit too often lest the magic grow thin.

I trounce through the stalls one by one as a hunter would , unsure what i would find, but yet cautious to hide my delight whenever i spotted something that interest me lest the storekeeper raise the prices.

Crystal glasses to match the set that came from another market? Bartered for a shower of silver.

An ancient hammer revived with a hand polished wooden handle? Bought for a flake of blue.

And as I stooped to investigate a particularly pretty set of salt and pepper shakers, something caught my eye. A medallion of Sir Stamford... here? Amongst these things? How odd indeed! And as I stood to leave the stall, I looked at the lonely metal disc sitting amongst the other shiny items. The first knight errant of my land should not have to endure this, thought I as I picked the weighty disc up. A bargain is stuck for 3 gold nuggets and Sir Stamford makes his way to my pocket.

So the adventure continued,

Hand blown glass decanter for port complete with glasses and a kettle seemingly hawn from a block of ice in exchange for a flash of orange fire from my hands.

A dish rack I was keenly observing was given to me for the price of a smile.

And all around the cheerful throb of the market can beheard, dogs chatting with each other as they walk their owners through the shops. A young boy bartering with an old man for a trinket, Pavarotti and the Beatles float through the air, melding into a strange duet of sorts.

And just round the corner I can still almost see, friends from long ago wave back at me.
And looking on this market ground, amongst the cries of shillings? No, pounds!
Crystalline memories of days gone by, change hands to find surprised,
the smile on the face of owners new, at a treasure now possessed.

Man I love this market

Random thoughts of the passing train

For those of us familiar with the daily commute to the

My mind's caliber lately is like that of the of the just woken, or end of day work dulled worker / student.

With the exception of the duels with the moon , the days seem to just be slowing drumming away.

And still the count down continues... departure imminent...

I need to organize, flights, movers, housing, communications, bills, taxes, budgets.

*breathes*

Furniture, car moving, a fridge, packing, clothes, cash flow... the list goes on.

Funny, but the last time I did this, I was so much more gung ho about it.

Now, I don't feel like saying good byes.

Friends, as much as I enjoyed tonight's farewell for JL.

There's something so... final and dramatic about such events, followed by the

The climatic anti-climax if you will. As a month or 2 later,

the inevitability of life moves on and names like JL, MC and KC become, simply that, just names of the dearly departed.

You see my friends, I've done it all before, to return 3 years later to... well, I believe most of you will recognize your parts in the new friendscape i've built in the last 2 years.

So whilst I'd like to think its not goodbye and more as as see you later.

This time, perhaps I'd rather fade into night sooner and on my own terms, rather then to disappoint or be disappointed.

Cynical i know it sounds, but my friends, prove me wrong.

Please do.

Stardust

A story retold, even if a little differently.

A man smiles. Finding himself once again lost in the tale.

A companion's laughter. Decent conversation over a meal.

Clouds breaking to see the moon.

Of golden discs and American tails.

The ebbing tide of time stills, for shining moments.

And infinity is measured in the verse of a song.

Damned Insomnia ... again

I'm exhausted... I truly am

Drained is a better word for tonight.

yet sleep eludes me... again...

Things that float in my mind tonight.

Boats, flows, fires.

No beds awaiting.

That scent.

Foody food.

Tofu recipes

The end of eras

The avatar of ego

The strength I need.

The art of scimitar fighting (The blade wounds, the daggers kill)

Weaknesses

Pride

I am... Caravaggio

Moving orders

The silence of the cafe is shattered as Boots drags the unconscious poet in.

Suit looks up from his vigil and stares hard and says "What the hell happened to him?"

"Fool boy got a little brave" grunted Boots as he peeled the ruined armor off the limp figure.

"Borrowed my gear and went out all by himself"

Suit gets up and strides across the room to examine his friend, making sure he was alright, only pausing at the large injury on the right shoulder.

"I see you taught him the lance" he comments quietly as he moved on to inspect the armor.

"He took it straight in the chest!" exclaimed Suit as he turned furiously on Boots, "Did you not teach him to protect himself?"

"I tried to! He wouldn't take it on! Said his magic would protect him, said that a knight didn't need armor. I had to force him to put the thing on!"

"I see... that boy, he always had some strange ideas" said Suit as he reigned in his anger. "You got involved too?" he asked softly as he noticed that Boots too was bleeding from a multitude of small wounds himself.

"Someone had to make sure he got back in one piece." Shrugged the weary soldier.

"He did know didn't he?" asked Suit as he turned away from the other men to hide is own fatigue.

"Know what?"

"That lances shatter on impact?"

"I'm sure he did, but he choose it nevertheless. I don't believe what a fool he was... is...erggg."

Suit pauses and turns, staring the soldier straight in the eyes.

"Were you not like that too when I found you out there and brought you here?"

Suit turns away again and stares out at the crossroads,

"Tend to your wounds and patch the boy up, we have our orders. We march at dawn"


epilogue

On a distant hill far away,

where the remains of a shattered lance lie.

Time and tide do walk on by.

But in the cold and early morn,

Flutters a tree, a fern, a frond?

No, a flower golden like the blazing sun.

Rises up for tomorrow's song.

Fortune favours the bold

Tugging on the borrowed armor, chaffing yet so familiar,the poet surveys the scene.

Not quite what he imagined he admits to himself, even as he recalls the words of his suited friend no battle plan survives first contact with the enemy.

Then, a glint catches his eye and he realizes that trophy is within reach.

Now or never he thinks as he kicks the stallion into a charge, its time to end this.

Like a silver bolt the cavalier streaks, plowing through the air.

As the warhorse pounds the distance away, the poet weaves his tune, filling the air with the power of his magic.

Wooden lance turns into lightning, imbued with power, with mystery with song.

Closing his eyes at the final moment, he waits for the impact.

silence...silence...silence

where did it go?

And then, the deafening roar of the lance shattering...

the sensation of flying through the air...

then... darkness.

3rd one's a charm

A thought just occurred to me. I think I missed the boat.

Cafe at Crossroads

A desk jockey sits at a cafe, over looking a cross road, sipping his wine, savoring the aroma.

A warrior steps in from the dusty road, and casts a glance across the place.

Eyes meet, a nod is shared, the table is joined.

Cold beer and vintage wine they share, a quiet disdane and yet grudging respect for each other, in silence they sit, watching the cross roads.

A man wearing a jumper coloured like a bumblebee walks in looking lost, not a table he belongs to, the salary man stares on at the road, and with a slight flick of his wrist gestures.

The warrior stares with a steely gaze, but pushes a chair out with his boot and grunts to desk jockey, "a poet i betcha".

The officeman just smiles and without taking his eyes off the dusty trail answers "i think he needs a scotch"

The poet sits down and thanks the men for the seat, and then chatteringly begins to talk about his journey there, the other 2 sit quietly letting the words wash about them.

And they watch the road.

An odder trio you might never see. Sitting in a cafe, a pub, a bar overlooking the crossroads.

The day wears on and sunsets yonder, dinner is ordered and almost in one voice "Steak, medium rare"

The night wears on and still they chat in the night breeze, of war, of pain, of joy, of life.

suddenly, stillness falls upon the night, and the full moon breaks through the cloud cover.

As one they rise and look to the road.

Silent partings washed in silver, the men walk on.

The table is empty except for 3 shining bands.

Of silver beaten, imperfect beauty.
Of darkness banded, of strength embodied.
Of Light captured, in infinite splendor.

Mr Wiscom

Mr Wiscom sits on the floor,

The little red light flickers weakly, like an imagined heartbeat.

I remember...

Phone calls - hours long, with a phone bought at an indian discount shop. $5? $10? I don't remember.

It had the shortest cord, and the only working socket was in the living room.

The only air conditioning was in the bed room.

There were but 2 chairs in the house, both were too tall to sit and use the phone.

a nsf recruit got $450 a month.

an honours graduate in engineering got $450 a month.

The phone bill was about $300

There was a reserve, present but untouchable, in australian dollars, in american dollars, just in case... just in case.

So with sleight of hand and quip of mouth, Mr Wiscom was claimed.

And served like a loyal manservant he did. The darkest secrets, the brightest hopes...

Stowed away and homeward bound, he served again, watching every meal catching every word.

And now as the red light flickers, flickers, dies...

I remember.

Safe Arrivals

I put the phone down and return to work.

Some thing lacking in that voice, like fatigue had stretched it beyond tensile limits.

I've worried and offered help, but understandly some battles are meant to be fought alone.

It is like watching a rally car speed into one of those mountain tunnels in the swiss alps.

Tyres squealing and engine roaring, fighting to stay in the lanes even before it reaches the tunnel entrance.

And then ZOOM!!! as it speeds past the crowd, swallowed by the inky blackness of the moutain pass (that's my melodrama for you, the alp tunnels are actually very well lit in an orange glow, and rally cars NEVER drive in there)

Now, there is nothing to do but sit at the other end of the tunnel and wait, with hope that the car will victoriously emerge.

A moroccan wonder bar

I shifted through my mind,

wondering who to bring along to my good bye to this place.

Names and faces flashed past, as would their excuses,

too busy, too tired, still working, too reserved, too... well too many too-s!

And then the ball landed on an unlikely candidate...

The offer was accepted and yay we went.

And as i stepped in, the sight, sounds and smells welcome me like an old friend.

The kind, moody and haggish matron of the place greets me like she would remember me.

I return the favour.

no menu? asks my companion, I just smiled as I remember when i too asked that very same question.

The dishes arrive and I behold the look of wonderment in the eyes of my guest.

The colours! The textures!

And as she comps down on the morsels that I once dreamed about so far away.

I smiled again.

The moroccan soup bar claims another convert.

So...friggin...happy

Its been a hell of a day, but I wanted to cheer one more person up.

After hunting for an eyepatch (i found none) i set off with with the payload.

omochi time!

then as i was leaving,

a present?

for me?

Elegant scrawl on envelope - Smile breaks out.

Bye byes are said and as I leave.

The envelope is opened... and suddenly I'm grinning so hard it could break diamonds.

In fact, i'm still smiling.

The r is for real... so very real.

Darkness falls

The day started off as normal,

The alarm clock buzzed and i silenced it again and again (I have adaptive snooze on it see)

then the phone rang...

a cry for help... I paused my day.

I drove, i counselled, I prayed.

The story unfolded, betrayal upon betrayal. Hearts bleed and tears flow.

Anger rises and seeks vengence... the quiet voice calms it down.

The wounds are tended but i feel like a battle field medic, band aids over bullet holes I apply.

The little battler struggles to her feet and pushes on. I pray for strength over her.

My afternoon flows on, the story resonating over and over...

Words start appearing, disrespect, betrayal, cowardance.

Anger builds.

I pick up the phone, a last lifeline i will cast.

I am trying very hard to control my voice now,

i've heard what's happened and i want to to terrible things to make you hurt.

I only have one question, "why did you make the girl cry?"

retreat on the other end of the phone, words rage in the ether... COWARD!

My hands shake with rage as i control not to slam the phone down.

I sit in stunned silence as rage so familiar thunders within me.

This was the last straw,

excommunication,

it is done.

God is good!

There is no doubt!

See what he tells me tonight!

My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest

Exodus 33:14

tremble oh city of adelaide.

The glory of the almighty comes with Carravaggio.

A fool by any other name

Well folks,

I'm drained from healthy healthy exercise, its monday tomorrow and i need sleep, but it seems we all are these days no?

I wanted to insert a quote here, i just can't remember it, something from conrad's heart of darkness... something about the inevitability of things.

But its slipped away from my grasp like a slippery eel under the waves.

So here's something more jovial instead!


I have an idea that the phrase "weaker sex" was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm. ~Ogden Nash

and for the expression that my lady readers now have on their faces.

The women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy. ~Ellery Queen

it was a good weekend, filled with progress and sunlight, bringing strength and vision.

if only all of life's obstacles could be solved by boxes with airholes in them.

in the mean time, the turbo spools and the countdown begins.

Damned Insomnia

Lack of sleep dulls the mind.

And this carravaggio is one dull carrot right now.


Things of import to note down before I loose command of my england.

1) 2 Prophets have confirmed it, fruits of the spirit = salvation!
2) God Rocks!
3) Another time around the mountain..
4) words of the spirit (to be confirmed) its time for war.
5) Brothers in arms are placed by God.
6) midnight shopping - Bargain Appliances!
7) The Korean initiative.

A song for the night

A song that perhaps, is well matched to my own timbre.

Just a sweet tune for the midnight moon

when amongst the darkness looms,

mingled memories of tears and smiles,

of frowns and sweetness all around.

frayed tempers and minds alike,

these memories flit into the night.

to entwine into the gentle breeze,

of songs and music that speak the soul.

You were always on my mind

Maybe I didn't love you
Quite as often as I could have
Maybe I didn't treat you
Quite as good as I should have
If I made you feel second best
Girl I'm sorry I was blind

You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind

Maybe I didn't hold you
All those lonely, lonely times
And I guess I never told you
I'm so happy that you're mine
Little things I should have said and done
I just never took the time

You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind

Tell me, tell me that your
Sweet love hasn't died
And give me
Give me one more chance
To keep you satisfied
satisfied

Little things I should have
Said and done
I just never took the time

You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind....

Dinner for one

Yes, I admit it, I hate being alone in a restaurant.

I dread the concept of walking in and asking for a table for one at dinner time.

Sure I do it for lunches during a work day, watch the occasional movie myself or even go shopping myself sometimes.

but dinner alone in a restaurant? That is loneliness.

Work is work only when it works

3 weeks to finishing up at work.

You'd think that as the only person running a bunch of heavy industrial jobs easily worth a million dollars a month they'd be keen to start me downloading all my work and head knowledge to someone else.

Nope, nothing, nada, zip, no one to take my work. Oh well, it doesn't matter, I can only do my best. And come the end of the month, its not my problem any more.

On to other things. *Clicks to start another post*

Stardust!

Stardust is coming! stardust is coming!

I'm trying hard not to get excited, but but... I am!

I long to go see it, to see that picture novel that was thrust into my unwilling hands those years ago come alive on the big screen.

I'd ask someone to join me, but who to bestow such an honor?

I'm... singing?

Folks, Ever caught urself in the middle of humming or singing, without even realizing?

Well, that's what i just caught myself doing.

Its a ditty I haven't sung in ages, and one that i had hoped would be received better, whether or not the performance was intended

There was a time when I could captivate and entrance my audience with my flawed but earnest performances.

Nowadays, i can't even lift an eyebrow of a single patron.

Has my song been lost in the chaos of life? Or is my music just too dated for the people of this day and age?

To go where no Caravaggio has gone before!

The decision was made a few days ago, but I have tried to let my friends know in person (or at least on the phone) before I posted it up.

But I'm moving to Adelaide!

Whooo!

well.. small whoo anyhow.

I've taken up the job offer mentioned from posts past and have officially resigned from the Hive.

I will move from Melb the sometime late in the first week of October and move to Adelaide (exotic!) for a year before moving again to sydney.

My thoughts are... well I think its all happened so fast that I'm still in shock and living my day to day life as normal.

I need to get excited, i need to pack, to label, to buy new stuff, to plan.

I've gotten soft these last 2 years.

Its time to get moving.

Lady Brighton

Just a song that's stuck in my head...

She's always a woman

She can kill with a smile. She can wound with her eyes.

She can ruin your faith with her casual lies

And she only reveals what she wants you to see.

She hides like a child But shes always a woman to me

She can lead you to love. She can take you or leave you.

She can ask for the truth. But shell never believe you.

And she'll take what you give her, as long as its free.

She steals like a thief. But shes always a woman to me


Chorus

Oh-she takes care of herself. She can wait if she wants. She's ahead of her time.

Oh-and she never gives out. And she never gives in. She just changes her mind.

And she'll promise you more than the garden of eden.

Then shell carelessly cut you And laugh while youre bleed'in.

But she'll bring out the best And the worst you can be.

Blame it all on yourself, Cause she's always a woman to me

Chorus

She is frequently kind. And she's suddenly cruel.

She can do as she pleases. She's nobodys fool.

But she cant be convicted. She's earned her degree.

And the most she will do, Is throw shadows at you, But she's always a woman to me

Time to fly

So many reasons to stay, so many reasons to go.

The promise of new beginnings,

the memory of before.

The weight of the mountain,

the sighs that say too much.

Conversations that don't say enough.

I hope I remember how to fly.

I hope to God that I actually did know how to.

But most of all, I pray for wisdom.

To infinity, and beyond.

Signs...

i've spent the weekend in Adelaide and have only now discovered that my room has a internet connection! (I needed to go out and buy an ethernet cable see?)

It is as most people have told me, a quieter city then Melbourne.

I do know absolutely no one here (well after this weekend I've met a married couple that are friends of my friends)

And the overheads will shoot up drastically if i make the move.

Yet... the Lord has pointed me a few times to Abraham.

Leave your contry, your people and your father's household and go to the land i will show you... - Gensis 12:1

I am still gathering my thoughts to solidify the decision, but I am probably going to make the move.

This new path ahead, is an unknown, is an adventure... is... is going to need his guidence.

My Lord, guide my path.

The plot thickens!

The saga continues!

My current employer tried to retain my services today with a counter offer. Unfortunately, they have fallen about 15% short...

The familiar duels with the unknown in my mind, and right now, its still an even match.

Oh well...

Love is...

I'm sure everyone's heard the by now lame saying that if you love something you gotta learn to let it go.

This thought of course intermingles with a whole bunch of other ones.

Sad accusing eyes, "Lets be honest, you never did love me in anyway"

An almost broken man "If you loved me I would be enough for you"

A friend swigging a bottle of whiskey "Twas better to have love and lost no?"

And i am brought back to the imagery of the grain of sands in an open palm.




Say what you like to make yourself feel better, to numb the pain, to move on.

But nothing will change the fact that what was being learnt happened.

And that is why we both fly on now.

This, this is love.

The music of the night

Just returned from Phantom of the Opera and wow! It was totally worth the wait.

Warlow as Phantom is just sensational, his portrayal of the man in the mask so convincing it stuck a chord.

Thanks to B for being gracious and allowing me to watch it even when there was no need to.

Its real...

The head hunters contract arrived today via email.

I had already anticipated that there would be a short window with which I could consider it.

So I prepped the HR lady yesterday by telling her that I would be attending to some of my remote oil rig projects and would only be back in town over the weekend to read the offer.
*What? i really do have oil rig projects! 2 as we speak in fact!*

So its here, in my hot little hands, with a few days of extra time to consider.

Will I take it? I still don't know...

The answer lies within myself see?

I right now, I still don't know what I want...

An offer!

The story concludes (from http://caravaggio-song.blogspot.com/2007/08/headhunted.html)!

Whilst waiting for something back from the headhunters, I told my family and friends, No way am i moving to Adelaide! The only way I'd even think about this offer is if they have me XX package and guaranteed me a posting to Sydney in a year!

I even told God, Dear lord, if it is your will that i should consider this offer, pls let it be at least XX package and a guaranteed posting to Sydney in a year

And then today i get the call from the HR lady.

Hi, We're prepared to make you an offer... of XX package and a guaranteed posting to Sydney in a year. I'll be sending you the softcopy of the contract for your approval.

Now I start getting nervous... 25% more pay. Yet out of Melbourne? Away from my family, friends and Doggies?

I look at prices of rental and whoa! there just went most of my new raise... and the industry?

Sure being part of a project to build missle destroyers sounds cool, but the defense industry is so... well, put it this way, all the defense contractors in the country fight for the attention of the one single client. Is this a wide scope industry?

It seems to be a move for my next 2 years at least. 1 in Adeliade and 1 in Sydney.

Bo Grosso would tell me to just shuddup and stop being a wuss.

What would you do my friends?

An offense preceived...

Well folks,

It feels like raging tempest in my head at the moment.

Trials of the home front, the tide at work and the recent events of i don't know whats coming from the friendship side are certainly not making things easy for me.

As has been practice of late, i jumped into the car to clear my head, something about jets of compressed air and fuel being exploded at extremely high rates just helps me vent.

It is taking all of my strength to fight off stray thoughts, of wars fought and lost, of cloak and dagger games played to the timeline of questions you don't really want answered.

God help me ride through this, for when I am weak, you are strong.

Deliver me from the darts of the wicked one and fill me with your peace.

I am trying hard not to lean on my own strength, that avatar built from ego and bravado, fueled with fury.

That Caravaggio has the finger poised over the button of excommunication, to be rid of all involved and just carry on with life without breaking stride.

Instead I shall right now surrender it all to the lamb, even as my mind fights to relinquish it.

God, give me grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things that should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.

That You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain.


Oh how I need those words more than ever.

Etiquette...

How much time is sufficient for mourning?

It seems that the going rate is now 6 weeks.

It may not be my business anymore, but some things don't vibe right...

I hope that if ever I am in a similar situation, I am more sensible.

All is fair in love and war?

I think for now, I'll stick to war, where at least, i was rarely a fool.

PhoBoy my friend, I hope for all our sakes you grow up faster.

For the path you seek makes fools of all men, and one which in my eyes, you are certainly ill equiped for.

Update:

PhoBoy, you have no idea how much self control and restraint I just practised...

Corrinne May...

It is a strange relationship I have with music.

It moves me, sometimes...

But when it does my mind and heart will swim circles in whatever it is that has caught me in its updraft.

Recent additions to this list are:

Everything by the once hated Michael Bublé

How did you fall? by newly discovered Chris Rice

Maybe you've been brain washed too - The only new radicals album ever. It finally made it on the list after 9 years...

But i digress, i chanced upon one of my favourite singer song writers releasing a brand new album. It is rare that i pay for a cd nowadays, but darn I pulled out my wallet fast for this one.

I've missed her concerts twice in the rare occasions she performed in singapore. And this being only her 2nd album, I had to have it.

so on its way to me is an *hopefully* autographed copy of her latest album.

She may not be the best singer, or writer.

But when her music plays, somewhere inside, Caravaggio dances.

Caravaggio discovers facebook!

Bo Grosso: Dude, check out face book.

Me: Is this like friendster? *logs on and signs up*

Bo Grosso: Sorta, but more interactive, there's lotsa stuff you can do there.

Me: Right... this looks just like friendster, you must be bored at work or something.



Yes yes, call me behind with the times, but i've recently discovered facebook.

And whilst i think the fandangled apps to customize your profile page are yet another incarnation of the "starbucks syndrome" (Its not coffee, its an identity! Mocah latte Grande half caf with a dash of netmeg please ).

I found it great to find old friends that i lost touch with. And WOW ppl have certainly gotten busy!

shy quiet girl turns hyper fitness junkie.
Socialist campaigner in uni actually moving to cuba.
Grand European citynames in the location field.

Facebook, thanks for letting me find some old friends again.

And thanks to you Bo Grosss, for getting me on it.

This present darkness

I have been busy at work these last 2 days.

Things going back to the way its always been.

From what you ask?

Sunday I faced darkness, a demon not of my own and uncontainable.

Things went back to normal on monday... but with scars so deep i can feel them in the darkest night.

the worst thing is?

I'm almost used to it...

Duty is the heaviest burden...

Love is long suffering

1 Corinthians 13:4

Yes it is... yes it is

Israel - Still Standing Lyrics

You gave me courage to believe that all your goodness I will see and if it had not been for you standing on my side where would I be

To you I lift my offering and set my heart on higher things for if it had not been for you standing on my side where would I be

If not for your goodness if not for your grace I don't know where I would be today if not for your kindness I never could say I'm still standing if not for your mercy if not for your love I most likely would have given up if not for your favor I never could say I'm still standing but by the grace of God

I'm still standing I'm standing I'm still standing but by the grace of God




More Israel Lyrics...

Saturday night Fever

For the first time this year Caravaggio hit the clubs last night!

Do I still have the moves? Yes I do, u know i do!

OOhhh yeah

Here's a few highlights


(1) Funking Mambo tunes whilst waiting to get in
(2) Watching sam sam the indon man try to pick up
(3) Realizing the girl in (2) was a "working girl" that was attending to her sugar daddy
(4) Watching a skinny Vietnamese fella try to pick up with the line "do you speak english?"
(5) Watching a girl practice her grooves... on a wall.
(6) No smoky smells on leaving the club.

All in all, not too shabby a night!